Home' LOTL : June 12 Contents Looking for some advice? Ladywood and the
Domestic Duchess have you covered.
Dear Ladywood and Domestic Duchess
I am a new lesbian. I am also a virgin and do not believe in sex before
marriage. I have met a lovely girl and I want to tell her that I am not ready
to lose my virginity outside the sanctity of marriage (because that is
what I have been taught), but I have also been told that lesbians cannot
get married. Is this true? What does this mean? Confused
LW: It means you’ll be waiting to have sex! Seriously, you’ve opene d up
quite the can of Sapphic worms, Confused. There are sooo many topics here,
I don’t know where to star t.
DD: There’s a first for ever ything , LW.
LW: I suppose we ne ed to determine how a lesbian loses her virginity. In
our heterosexist society, sex often means intercourse between a man and a
woman. The Dictionar y defines “sexual intercourse” as: 1. Coitus between
humans. 2 . S exual union betwe en humans also involving genital contact
(other than vaginal penetration by the penis). It also defines a virgin as: A
person who has not experienced sexual intercourse. Confusing huh?
DD: Ahh., the definition of ‘sex’. Some cultures are obsessed with the
‘technical’ definition of sex, which means that both sexes can give and
re ceive blow-jobs, hand-jobs and even have anal intercourse. As long as no
vaginal/penile penetration has occurre d, virginity is not ‘te chnically’ lost.
DD: That sounds a bit like Clinton saying “I did not have sex with that
woman”, but we all know that Monica wasn’t receiving a knighthood when
she was kneeling in front of the President.
LW: Is that why it’s called the Oral, I mean Oval Office? I hate to sound
cold here Confused, but it looks like ever ything is sor ted. Keep one foot on
the floor at all times and you will be right.
DD: Heartless, LW. I would’ve expected more from you. I ’ve heard some
half wits ask, “How do you know you are a lesbian if you haven’t had sex?”
Those same people would never ask a heterosexual the same thing. Could
you imagine some one asking a virgin bride if she really is straight because
she hadn’t ‘tried it’? There is so much more to a lesbian relationship other
LW: Yeah, it’s called LBD (Lesbian Bed Death).
DD: That’s it! I’m booting you off the rest of this one, LW. Sorr y,
Confused. The best you can do with your girl is establish some ground ‘rules’
in the bedroom. Agre e what is acceptable and what you and your religious
beliefs are comfortable with. I am ver y sorr y to say that there is tr uth in the
fact we cannot leg ally marr y but one way around that is by having a ‘Civil
Union’, or a commitment ceremony. You can ask a celebrant or religious
leader to overse e the two of you exchanging promises or vows to each other.
Ver y similar to a wedding ceremony but without the leg alities. Maybe one
day this will be different.
lotl.com • Lesbians On The Loose Magazine
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