Home' LOTL : April 12 Contents From long time companion to civil partner to
married couple... Are we there yet?
lotl.com • Lesbians On The Loose Magazine
Health | Lifestyle
Marriage. Civil partnerships. Long-term committed relationships.
Just a few words to describe the coming together of two people
who love one another. It is a truly wonderful thing when someone
finds that person or persons who they want to share their life with. What is
often forgotten is the hard work that individuals must go through to reach this
stage of their relationship.
From the beginning of a relationship, when both parties have their ‘rose-
coloured glasses’ on, it’s possible that problems are not seen or get glossed over.
Maybe one person is very neat, the other not so much . Maybe one is a saving
goddess, and the other doesn’t see the point in saving and wants to live in the
here and now. These differences may not come to light until you get to know
one another a bit better.
Deciding to move in tog ether is another major step in a relationship. This is
when partners really get to know each other. Is one person a complete nudist
at home, or someone leaves their socks ever ywhere, or perhaps doesn’t feel
the need to keep the house spotless. Then there’s the division of chores, who
gets to do what? Finances, who pays for what, and alone time, is each person
entitled to the same amount ?
Getting a pet ? Or already have one ? Or both parties already have one and
you are trying to get them to live harmoniously. Maybe you have different
standards in terms of lo oking after your pets, required number of walks, fo od,
vet visits, where they sleep, are they an inside or outside animal?
Planning to start a family? Already have a blended family from previous
relationships? How does that logistically work? Do you adopt? Do you co -
parent with another couple? IVF? Turkey baster ? Where do es the sperm come
from, someone close, or a stranger ? Whose name does the child get ? Once
baby is older, what sport do they play? Who is in charge of driving them to said
sport? Public or private school?
All of these stages, al l the ins and outs, ever y part of it can be wonderf ul
but equally it can be a ver y stressful time. When people think about calling
a counsel ling ser vice it’s often because of the big things, not the small, but
a lot of sma ll things can get out of hand. Sometimes it’s better to talk to an
independent person before this happens.
If this all sounds familiar, or you just need to chat about something , give our
trained volunteer counsellors at Switchboard a call. Our ser vice is completely
anonymous and we are happy to both listen and offer referra ls if needed.
Gay and Lesbian Switchboard
Counselling: (03) 9663 2939 (Melbourne) or 1800 184 527 (Regional Victoria
Monday to Thursday 6pm to 10pm; Wednesdays 2pm to 10pm; Friday,
Saturday, Sunday & Public Holidays 6pm to 9pm
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